At our Aging Together event in Willmar, the Senior Caucus heard over and over again about how caring for family members can become a regular part of our lives, often at unexpected times. Here’s Vivian’s caregiving story:
In 2000, Vivian’s mother-in-law had a stroke, just 7 days after Vivian’s own mother passed away. The stroke left her left mother-in-law’s arm and hand compromised, and she also suffered a fall requiring a rod in the bone. This was an extremely stressful time for all of them.
Her mother-in-law went from assisted living to independent living in Willmar, where she has been for five years. At age 90, she is “determined and spunky”. When she decided to move to an apartment closer to the elevator, people told her that it was a bad idea because she would hear the noisy elevator. But this social woman just said, “I’ve decided to like it, and I will.”
Vivian and her husband live in Willmar and the rest of the family is scattered, although they receive some caregiving help from other family members. There are also times when Vivian and her husband need to get away for a while, and the rest of the family helps.
For Vivian and her husband, caregiving looks like taking their mother-in-law to church, driving her to doctor’s appointments, helping her manage her diabetes, and taking her on outings. Generally, Vivian’s mother-in-law is doing quite well and is getting the level of care she needs. Vivian feels that the care they are required to give is just what one does. She feels grateful that their life is stable.
None of know exactly when we’ll require care or exactly when we may be called upon to be caregivers. But many of the stories we heard at the event in September were a lot like Vivian’s – when a need arose, family caregivers answered the call and became incredibly important caregivers for their loved ones.
